


Pride in their port (defiance in their eye)

by Ahria



Category: Big Bang Theory
Genre: Bets, Community: 7snogs, F/M, LiveJournal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-18
Updated: 2013-02-18
Packaged: 2017-11-29 18:34:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 945
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/690142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ahria/pseuds/Ahria
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Leonard learns to think before he speaks and Penny judges a kissing contest.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pride in their port (defiance in their eye)

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Pride
> 
> Title taken from a quote by Oliver Goldsmith: "Pride in their port, defiance in their eye. I see the Lords of human kind pass by."
> 
> Warnings? I was a little less charitable with Leonard than I meant to be.

“Name one thing you are better at than I am.” Sheldon demanded again, having just disproven every claim Leonard had offered. 

Penny rolled her eyes from the sofa and flipped the page of Cosmo.  The argument had been going on for a good twenty minutes now and she was incredibly bored.  She wondered if two in the afternoon was too early for wine.

“Kissing.” Leonard announced triumphantly.  “I’m sure I’m better at kissing than you are.”

Penny decided it was never too early for wine. 

Sheldon snorted derisively.

“If I were to go along with such a ridiculous notion, implying kissing to be a useful or relevant skill- which it is not- how would we verify your hypothesis?”

“You could kiss Penny, let her be the judge.” Leonard offered with a smirk. 

“He could what now?” she snapped, magazine falling to the floor as she jumped to her feet.  Her boyfriend offered his best abashed smile.

“Don’t worry, it’s not like he’d ever go for it.”

“What is _wrong_ with you?” she demanded, striding towards the door.

“Come on, Penny, it was just a joke.” He pleaded.

“You don’t get to just rent me out like a DVD!” she yelled at him then looked at Sheldon, took in his bemused expression.  “Don’t take this personally, sweetie.”

Sheldon nodded.  “I would be equally displeased in your situation.”

“See?  Even he gets it.”

“You’re not helping, Sheldon.” Leonard said unhappily.  Sheldon shrugged at him.

“I’m sorry, really.”

She glared at him, unconvinced.

“You know I wouldn’t have made that joke if it were Howard or Raj.” He tried again.  Penny looked at Sheldon again, took in the way his eyes were narrowing.  “I mean, come on, the guy’s practically phobic of physical contact.”

Sheldon’s mouth pressed into a thin line.

“Besides, he knows he could never beat me at it.”

That was it.  He’d pushed Sheldon over the edge into that place where winning was all that mattered.  Penny could see it on his face.

She told herself her decision was only to keep the physicist from the crazy rampage that now loomed over their heads.  Maybe it was even to punish Leonard a little.  It certainly wasn’t because some part her had always thought Sheldon could put his mouth to a better use than condescension.

“Fine.” She announced.  “Here in the apartment, twenty four hours.”

They both stared at her, Leonard’s mouth hanging slightly ajar.  Sheldon recovered first, nodding his agreement.

“Run this by Amy first.” Penny ordered, expression baring no arguments. 

“Come on, Penny, you can’t be serious.” Leonard said.

“Think of the bragging rights if you win.” She replied.

She made sure to walk calmly out of the apartment, shutting the door softly behind her.

*

“You don’t have to do this.” Leonard said.

“I know I don’t.” she replied with a sharp smile.

“Leonard and I flipped a coin to determine order.  He will be going first.” Sheldon said.

“How did you get Amy to give you permission?” Leonard asked.

“She negotiated three ‘real’ kisses from me, equal in length to the one I share with Penny, to be doled out at her discretion.” He answered.

Penny chuckled in amusement and motioned Leonard to come over to her.

He smiled at her, big and grateful, before sliding his arms around her waist, hands resting on her butt.  He pushed her against him, mouth on hers.  All of Leonard’s kisses were the same; passionate, desperate and a little over the top, more blunt force than skill.  He really tried, every time, and part of her would always be touched by the effort.

She nodded when he pulled away and did her best to keep a neutral expression.  She was supposed to be impartial, after all.  He frowned at her as he moved to the side.

“Hey, it’s your turn.” She called to the other physicist. 

Sheldon turned away from his laptop, opened a desk drawer and pulled out a new tooth brush, floss and a travel size bottle of anti-bacterial mouth wash.

“Sheldon!” she protested when he held them out to her.

“Do you have any idea how much bacteria lives in the human mouth?” he demanded. 

They glared at each other, a battle of wills.  Eventually, Penny got bored.  She decided she’d already come this far and might as well finish it.  With a huff, she snatched the supplies from his hand and stomped into the bathroom.

Several minutes later she returned, mouth still tingling from the most ridiculously minty mouth wash in the world.  Sheldon stood from his desk and faced her.

Leonard hovered next to them, one arm held across his body while his free hand pressed against his mouth, anxiety radiating from him.

“Turn around.” Penny ordered.

“What?  Why?  Sheldon didn’t have to.” He protested.

“He was on his laptop, not staring at us.  It’s weird.”

“This whole thing is weird.” He muttered sullenly as he turned around.

Sheldon moved closer, stopping a few inches away from her.  She gave him an encouraging nod to cover her sudden case of nerves.

Unhurriedly, he leaned down and kissed her.  His mouth lingered against hers for a moment before he parted his lips.  Sheldon’s kiss was slow, gentle and willing to follow her lead.  She took a step into him, chest pressed against his.  His right hand rose to cradle the back of her head while his left hovered at her side, fingertips resting against her arm.

She wasn’t sure how long it lasted.  Sheldon’s eyes stayed on hers when he pulled away, mirroring her surprise and confusion.  She looked away first.

Penny cleared her throat and Leonard turned around.

“So, who won?”


End file.
